C4 Johnny (Humanities story)
There is a man named Johnny who likes pie and only pie. This is because if he eats anything else he will explode. That is because when pie is made there is secret ingredient added called Shimsoap. Anything without Shimsoap with will ignite the C4 in his belly causing him to explode and die. He keeps his pantry filled with pies every day. The reason there is C4 in his stomach is because when he was four years old he swallowed some really unstable C4. Luckily for Johnny he swallowed the C4 very carefully and it did not go off. When Johnny turned 100 he became a really unhappy man, and always stayed in his house, you know like one of those people who kids tell scary stories of. On Monday September 3, 2097 Johnny went outside for the first time in a long time. He walked over to bakery and ordered a pie. Then he took a taxi to the mall. He wanted to go so he can see how it changed over the years. It had changed quit a bit. He walked past the bank and noticed something weird, he saw that there were people on the ground. When he walked in the store to see what was up someone yelled at him and told him to “get the ground!” Johnny “HELL NO!” and without thinking he pulled out a candy bar that he got from the girl scouts, and ran to bad guys, then shoved the bar his throat. Luckily Johnny was far enough away from the innocents that they were not harmed. At Johnny’s funeral everyone knew him as a hero. They ended up making a statue of Johnny… holding a pie.
